The Back Story

So how did this all get started, right?

This will be redundant for some, I've told this story before. I haven't been "thin" since I was a teen. I've struggled with my weight since I graduated from high school and put on the freshman 20. I've always eaten generally pretty healthy, (which has probably helped keep me in denial for about as long) but it's when the balance is tipped that I get into trouble. I have a pretty good sweet tooth and I love good food. But I've never been a binger or an over-eater. I think I just ate too many calorie rich foods too often.


This is about changing the way you think to have a healthier lifestyle. I had to tell myself it is just as easy to grab an apple as it is to grab a high calorie granola bar... or quarter pounder, or peanut butter cup blizzard, or whatever the vice. 60 calories? or 400 calories? big difference. And think of your children learning this while they're young and saving them the heartache of figuring it out on their own. What a gift. Because of our life choices, these children, statistically, are expected to live a shorter life than their parents.

(Mother's Day 2010, see my close up at the bottom to compare)

Since I had my children though, we've generally had a pretty healthy diet. Fruits, veggies, whole grain everything. BUT I also generally always kept ice cream on hand too. : ) We had also started to enjoy having a french loaf in the house that we could dip in balsamic and olive oil almost nightly. And I never really kept track of calories or carbs, but I did watch my fats. I couldn't figure out where I was going so wrong, besides not getting any exercise, I knew that was a problem, but not much I could do to change it with my schedule. You always hear about people that say, "oh, I just quit drinking soda and lost 20 pounds" or "I quit eating out and lost 30 pounds" well, we didn't do either of those on a regular basis, so I didn't think I had anything I could really take one sweeping stab at.

Then one night at a mommies' night out dinner in May of 2010, a friend mentioned that she had just invested in a really good blender and was making smoothies every day for her kids and making her own dressings, peanut butter, soups, etc, etc. Then it hit me. That could be really good for us. Quick in the morning for breakfasts, but perhaps get another serving of veggies in the kids before they even start the day. Sign me up. I did a ton of research, even went to Sam's and saw a demo, and finally decided on the BlendTec blender. Now, I'm not saying you need a fancy blender to make a green smoothie. You can use a regular blender, no problem. You may have to blend it longer (thereby processing the greens more than ideal, BUT it'll work) It's just that the BlendTec will make the best, most smoothest smoothie you've ever had. And it has a ton of other uses. I looked at this as the last blender I'd ever buy in my life and I planned to use it at least daily.

(spinach, mango, greek yogurt, cinnamon, almond milk in a frosty mug with a big smoothie straw- the way to go!)

That blender changed my life.

It was mid June. After a week of making veggie/fruit blended smoothies, I had lost about 4-5 pounds. I was shocked. Not what I had expected at all. I wasn't trying to lose weight, I was just trying to do something good for all of us. So I stopped to think. What had changed? I wasn't having my usual big bowl of whole grain Kashi with Silk soy milk, piled with strawberries, blueberries and bananas. Sounds healthy, right? It IS! (for someone that doesn't sit on their bum all day) But I can't burn all those carbs off. And it was around 30 carbs just for the cereal alone. I also noticed that the more green smoothies I had in the morning, the more my body craved veggies in the afternoon. I was making salads for lunch and eating more veggies at dinner. I was inspired by those few pounds that had evaporated without trying and I wanted to run with it, so I started to apply this thinking to other areas.

(July 2010, my face was already beginning to change.)

Pasta. We eat a lot of pasta, whole grain, but still.... all those carbs. Now, don't get me wrong. My middle name is MODERATION, so I wasn't about to eliminate every carbohydrate from my diet, but I knew that this was my major threat. When I would make pasta, I would substitute my plate with spaghetti squash. I don't mind the kids eating it, but my steamer only does 1/2 a squash at a time. So my hubby's biggest complaint was not being full at the end of dinner, so I kept serving them the whole wheat pasta. I also started to use a smaller salad plate instead of my typical dinner plate (about 8" instead of maybe 12"). I'd heard of this trick before. Smaller portions on this plate makes your brain think it's eating a lot more than if the same amounts were on a larger plate that looks more empty. Within a couple of weeks, I'd lost another 5 pounds and I was back into a tight size 14. But I was happier because I could see the light! I was a bit frustrated because no one could really notice yet, but that didn't stop me. I cut breads and tortillas out and we quit buying French bread to dip in olive oil at dinner. No more ice cream either. That was tough. But I knew I needed to watch the sugar more. I was bound and determined to NOT live a completely exclusive lifestyle. I was not going to "never eat bread again" or ice cream, or cake. I want to enjoy my life, for goodness sake. I just wasn't going to eat it every single day.

I bought a scale that could read BMI and bone density/water, etc. and I was happy to have something more accurate. I was a bit obsessive about the scale, but only because it encouraged me to keep it up. And the crazy thing was that I wasn't really missing the cereal anymore or all the breads. It was the beginning of August.

We ate out for a week during our trip to Disney World in September for my 35th birthday. I even enjoyed the Wishes Dessert Buffet while watching the fireworks over the castle. The trick to that was to take a bite out of everything I wanted to try, but only finish what I really loved. They were all tiny little mini desserts. We did a ton of walking that week, so that helped. I still lost 2 pounds.



Going into the fall, I started to use more frozen fruits and less fresh as they began to get more expensive and out of season. Eating healthy, for me, is getting back to healthy portions. 1/2 my plate should be vegetables and the other have should be 1/4 whole grains, 1/4 protein/meat. Sometimes, I would just opt for a humongous salad in a serving bowl. I could load it up, but it still never hit 400 calories. I would make my own dressing from fruits and balsamic or nuts. I would sprinkle treats like sunflower seeds or pistachios, glazed almond or walnuts and cranberries. I added whatever goodies I wanted on top because I knew it was still healthier than anything else I could have been eating. And I was still being reasonable with those toppings, but not depriving myself. And still losing weight.

It was Halloween and I was down 25 pounds. I could actually wear something cute for Halloween and I wasn't embarrassed about how I looked. A few people were starting to notice.



I was energized to keep going and find still more ways to be healthy. Eating out and holidays are two major areas of concern when you're trying to eat healthy. However, I looked at it this way, Thanksgiving was one day, Halloween and Christmas and even New Years, all just one single day. So for Halloween, I picked a couple pieces of candy out that night and I left the rest alone. Yes, you will have to have self control at some point in your life. That is where the "choosing to be responsible" comes in that I mentioned before. BUT you CAN enjoy a mini Twix if you want a mini Twix. You are not going to be obese all your life from one.

(KU home game November 2010, really noticing now how easy stairs feel because I'm actually lighter and my energy level has been so improved)

I enjoyed every dish at Thanksgiving (even my Yukon gold smashed potatoes with gouda cheese, cream and parmesan. I make them once a year. My mother on the other hand, had been on a very restrictive diet and had lost a lot of weight pretty quickly and having only a handful of pounds left to reach her goal, opted to not try a bite of the potatoes but replaced those with mashed steamed cauliflower. Folks, I can't live like that. I'm a foodie! I love to try all dishes that are fabulous, especially the ones that take a lot of work to make. I was sad for her. I would rather take off 50 pounds in a year and a half eating fairly consistently than to be under a doctor's care and "special" diet to drop it rapidly and then live in fear the next year that it's going to come back when I resume some foods I used to eat. But like I said, this blog is about what is working for me. You have to do what is right for you. I didn't have a heaping serving of anything. I had a modest taste of all that was prepared, and loved the cauliflower, too. To my mother's credit, it's been 7 months since then and she still looks great, she's very fortunate to have personal trainers and time for working out, pilates and massage therapists that most of us are not blessed with.

I lost another 5 pounds over the holidays.

In January, I was browsing through the Parks and Rec catalog to see what sport classes to sign the kids up for when I ran across two things I REALLY wanted to try. I paid $42 for a "flex card" to go to whatever Yoga class I wanted to that was offered at Crestview Community Center. There were a handful I thought might work with my schedule if I could make it when the kids were in preschool. I also thought the Shadowboxing class sounded totally fantastic. It was only $17 for 7 weeks, on Wednesday nights at 7:15.

I never went to one Yoga class. NASCAR season started in February and it just seemed impossible to make it over there during the day. My husband, unexpectedly (for me) turned our second vehicle over to his cousin's body shop for repainting. He said it would only take 2-3 weeks, but any time he took the kids to their Saturday classes, I was stuck at home. so the Yoga took a hit. As a matter of fact, 5 months later, the truck is still MIA making personal trips anywhere a scheduling hassle. (but I digress…) Luckily, the kids had a religion class on Wednesdays, and we were able to drop them off and then I could go to boxing and be picked up after they got out. It was still tricky, and I missed a few for work reasons too, but I was still signed up through July and I know the last 15 pounds came off more easily because of that class. I LOVE it! It's on a good night with work, doesn't matter the weather, there aren't a ton of skinny people there to make you feel like crap about your own body image, I like Laura's music selection, I get my aggressions out, I started seeing tone almost right away, I mean everything about it was great. And it's the ONLY fitness time I could spare. But EVERY pound I took off, I could basically attribute to eating healthy. I couldn't pin it on 3-4 hours per month of low cardio and toning. It helped, just can't take all the credit- or even most of it.

In February, my husband saw an infomercial for TurboFire. It sounded pretty awesome. I thought it looked super fun and he got me really excited about it, so I found it cheaper on eBay and we ordered it. We took our measurements, before pics, the whole 9. We lasted two weeks before we fell off the wagon. He got really sick and skipped a day and then NASCAR season started about the same week, mid-month along with the all-nighters that come with that -pshh, that was the end of that. I loved it, but there is no way I can sustain 45 min-1 hr work outs 5-6 days a week. Sorry, I just do not have the lifestyle that fits that. I work 40-70 hours per week and I never know how many it's going to be and I'm raising two children while I'm trying to work those 40-70 hours FROM HOME. From home, people. It's a blessing and a curse, let me tell you. So, I'm sticking to the shadow-boxing for now with hopes of being a TurboFire hottie come fall when my oldest little one hits Kindergarten and the other one is in preschool 4 mornings per week and maybe just maybe I can start to work a more normal daytime schedule and free up my evenings. I have a feeling the TurboFire will be on my terms though, not 6 days per week, but I might try to get back into it. I'm happy with shadow-boxing for now. The best thing that came out of TurboFire is that I lost a quick 4 pounds. And because my calories stayed the same afterward, of course it stayed off. So I know it works, it's just a huge time commitment.

So it was mid-March and I was down 35 pounds and super happy about cleaning out my closet, looking forward to the garage sale in May. I had hung on to clothes I'd worn and loved before my pregnancies and I was anxious and nervous to try them on. To my shock, most of it didn't fit! They were TOO BIG!! yay!

In my former life, I would lose five pounds and reward myself with a Dairy Queen Blizzard. hahahaa. Then I got an app on my phone that helps me count calories and that app (LoseIt!) tells me that the little blizzard I thought was fairly harmless, was over 600 calories! holy crap! People really don't know what they're pigging out on. So instead, now I buy new clothes!! It's a little more expensive, but WAAAAY longer lasting.

(May anniversary, 2011 in cutest dress from Maurices, my favorite place to shop)

I buy one new thing that fits and one new thing that's a little too small - just to encourage myself to keep it up! It's worked really well! It is so exciting to lose 3-5 pounds more and be able to zip up that cute little capri pant, or wear a slim top and not have to suck anything in, it feels amazing! By March, I was putting on a snug size 10. I actually weighed less than when I got married!

(our 2002 wedding, dress was a size 12)

That hadn't happened since I was 22 and in Air Force Basic Training. All the new 14's were huge and the 12's were pretty loose. I was kissing the 16's goodbye forever and had my sights set on a size 8! I bought two shorts in 8's and vowed to be in them for summer.

April and May quickly went by, so busy with holidays, birthdays, anniversaries… busy time.

(Mother's Day 2011)

Around the first of May, my husband saw a very cute, slim navy ruched dress on the front of a catalog on the counter and jokingly said, "if you can get into that, I'll buy you the washer and dryer you want."

(Ruched dress from Venus.com on sale right now for $24, I should order that!)

My bonus had been smaller this year than typical and I wasn't going to buy the set I thought I was going to get. Ours were over 13 years old and it was showing. I said, "how long do I have?" He said 6 weeks, no Spanx. I scoffed, "no problem." I was confident. I was only 5 pounds from my original goal anyway and I hadn't donned the Spanx since before Christmas. So to be fair, I added another 5 pounds to that goal, hoping to drop another 10 pounds total.

Well, he screwed that all up by going out and looking a washer/dryers because he found a sale and got them about 3 weeks early. Burst my bubble, really. I did lose the original 5 pounds I wanted to, but didn't get to the farther reaching goal. Losing it this slowly is healthy for the long term, but I know if I really want to trim down another 5 maybe even 10, I'll have to add more physical activity to burn it up. So tough for me with the little time I have for it. And with the kids out of morning preschool in May and home full time, whew, any minute of free time evaporated. I looked up the BMI charts and I would have to be at 129 to be considered "ideal weight". I know pictures of myself at that weight. I look sickly (my opinion anyway). I looked like that at Basic Training graduation after a 6 week course of barely anything but a liquid diet and 8 hours per day of physical exhaustion and a solid 6 hours of sleep per night.

(USAF Basic Training graduation, June 1998. I'd lost about 30 pounds in 6 weeks.)

None of which is close to a reality I could recreate today (surely that's why it all came back so fast, and besides, that's just not a "normal" life"- that's "the Biggest Loser Ranch" -hahahaa).

So the goal isn't to be 129. But I'm thinking 135-138 could be a really nice long term goal. That would likely put me in a size 6. wow. the thought of putting on my Oleg Cassini original design slinky hand beaded gown from my high school prom just gives me goose bumps. "THE Holy Grail". hmmm…. 20 year reunion coming up in 2013… ah, but I digress….. I just keep thinking, "what's another 5? then I get there and I think well, maybe I could do another 5. I'm in no rush, by next year, I could potentially be another 10 down, who knows? I think it's been good for me not to have a deadline, or be up against a beach vacation coming up, or wedding, or whatever.

It's now July and I'm down 43 pounds. Those size 8 shorts I bought? piece of cake.

(more clothing rewards! -40 lbs)

I actually went back this week to see if they had more of those shorts in different colors, but they only had a size 6 left. I hesitated trying them on, just seemed unrealistic to me. But I was curious to see how much work was ahead of me. Shock and awe. They slid on and zipped up pretty easily. However, they're too snug for me to wear them without being self-conscious about them, especially because they're khaki, I think that makes it worse. No worries. I think another 5 pounds and I'll have it. If that doesn't happen before the end of summer, no biggie, they'll be the first pair I wear next summer! I've been trying to remember to take a few close-ups now and then of my face because I'm really starting to see how it's changed. Cheek bones and lines, but also really clear skin way more often! And the heavy eyelids I used to always contend with that probably made me look way more tired and aged have evaporated away too.



I also finally had to admit that I may have to get my wedding ring re-sized. It slips off easily and I'm losing it when my hands are wet. I have a feeling this will only be worse when the weather turns colder.

Some bad news came this month, my shadow-boxing class is ending and it's not going to be available next fall. So super bummed, can't even explain it! I actually talked to some of the girls in class about hosting boxing night at our house so we can keep it up. But my schedule with work has been all over the place and I'm so afraid to commit to this with the other girls counting on me if a deadline comes up for work and I can't host. I'm really rethinking this, but would love to have an inexpensive alternative. Just not sure what to think, anxious to see how I'm going to figure it all out.

One other note before I close.... the last thing I want anyone to believe is that I'm on some "shake diet". Not at all. And I don't necessarily believe you should process ALL of your veggies and fruit into juice or smoothies and that should be every meal you ingest every day for the rest of your life. I'm not sure that would be sustainable, though I find some truth to a 10 or even 30 day "detox" period where you do only consume that. It sounds like you could get bored with that and then turn back to unhealthy choices. It's all about moderation! I have a smoothie in the morning or sometimes at lunch or even for a sweet treat at night when I'm craving a big ol' bowl of ice cream! Certainly not every meal, and sometimes not even every day. I also listen to my body. As a matter of fact, I was seriously craving an egg this morning. Sometimes I think that's my body's way of saying "your low in some nutrient this food provides". I had my mango, greek yogurt, spinach smoothie this morning with every intention of cooking up an over-easy egg, but when I finished the smoothie, I was too full. So, maybe for lunch, if I'm still "feeling it". No, that doesn't mean if you're hankering for a twinkie, it's your body's way of saying you're depleted in some "high fructose corn syrup creamy filling" nutrient, that's totally different and something you just overcome in time. You know, I haven't had a fast-food hamburger in over a year? I think I've only had a bite of a regular hamburger cooked at home once. I did make a Boca Burger over the 4th, but I haven't missed it one bit. Feed your body good stuff and it likes you back! Those cravings start to go away and they'll be replaced with cravings for better, healthier food.

And then look! You're old clothes can spring forth a second life!

(a dress in my closet from about 10 years ago!)

Of course, buying new is a little more fun....



I've found what works long term. I'm going to stay focused on a healthier lifestyle through my food choices. I sure hope you'll find something here that helps you, inspires you, or educates you - or all three!

Thanks for letting me share.

If you have any questions, leave them in the comments and I can try to address them in a new post, your question could help many others, so don't hesitate to ask! I'm not a nutritionist or a doctor, but I'm continually researching, so if I don't have the answer, I'll do my best to point you in the right direction!
peace and health to you - cheers!